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As of late I’ve preoccupied myself with the profound questions everyone faces. What do I really want to do with my life? How will I establish myself once and for all in a career? What am I willing to give up in order to achieve my goals? Most importantly, which of my various goals, dreams, aspirations are worthy of great sacrifice? I realize that I can’t have it all, at least not all at the same time.
I’ve said this so many times in the past, but I’ve been stuck in a state of debilitating indecision for far too long. It is time to move forward. I’m just not sure what my future will look like at all. I know this: I do not want to look back on my life with any regrets. This is probably the single most important lesson that I ever learned from my Dad.
As of late I’ve had too many reminders of just how fragile life is. The specific circumstances aren’t important. What is important is that I figure out just what I value and what I want to pursue. More importantly, as I’ve stated so many times before, I need to get to work.
Somewhere in the midst of all of this personal and professional upheaval of the last few months, an old quote from my childhood came to mind. “I Yam What I Yam, And That’s All What I Yam.” Throughout much of my childhood, my Mom taught 6th grade in the same elementary school I attended. During most of that time she had that quote, complete with an outline of Popeye, fixed to her desk.
My Mom loved Popeye growing up, and I am sure she saw it as a positive message for her students. It is positive. It is also a message I really need to remember now. I have to do what is right for me, no one else. I can’t be anyone else, no matter how hard I try. I’d love for my family, my Mom in particular, to fully understand what I am going through now, but they can’t possibly.
All I know is this: I do not need to apologize for just being myself and speaking my mind.
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